The latest statistics show that 60% of marriages end in divorce. Not all marriages have to end in divorce. Just like a fitness routine helps you to start getting in the habit of working out and getting in shape so does marriage fitness. There are a lot of ways to help prevent this. You will first want to figure out why you are not happy. Maybe it is from infidelity, boredom, lack of communication or just the lack of appreciation. No matter what the cause of your unhappiness, you want to make things better.

Baltimore, Maryland March 13, 2009 — There are many different things that can cause problems in a marriage. Whether it is because you feel like you are not in love with your spouse anymore or just feel like too much has happened that has made you grow apart. No matter the circumstances there is always time to shape up your marriage.

One of the best things that you can do to fix your marriage is to get some Marital Help. One way to do this is not just getting some counseling but actually whipping your marriage into shape. What I mean by this is that you need to get some steps in place. Most couples start out by trying to get some counseling. This not always works but ends up doing the opposite and puts more stress on the marriage. The reason for this is you start to play the blame game and start pointing out what the other person does and what they have done in the past.

If you are asking yourself; how do I Save My Marriage? One thing that you might want to look into is marriage fitness. Just like a fitness routine helps you to start getting in the habit of working out and getting in shape so does marriage fitness. The difference is that it helps you to start a routine that helps you get in the habit of communicating better or help you both get out of the rut your marriage might be in.

No matter what the problem is in your marriage you can always start with small steps. One of the best small steps you can make is subscribing to an e-mail marriage service. This is something that will help give you secrets that can help save your marriage.

There are many success stories out there that have sprouted just from taking the first initiative step and signing up for a free e-mail. They then started receiving information on marriage fitness. As a result, their spouses started to realize that their significant other really did care about their marriage and wanted to make things work. Another couple had tried marriage counselor after marriage counselor off and on for four years. They then decided to take another route and found that using marriage fitness helped them accomplish more in a shorter amount of time than 3 marriage counselors were able to do in the whole length of time. It was only when the couple had decided that it was no use and they were throwing in the towel that they found their answer.

Obviously, there is no one thing is going to work for every couple that is having marital problems. More people know what doesn’t work for them than what does. This is why you will want to make sure to take your time and do your research. Make sure that you explore all your options. You will want to make sure that you try a couple of things before you spend thousands of dollars on one thing that ends up being not for you.

The best way to explore your options is to see what services you can get for free to try out. This way you will be able to get an idea of what may work best on how to save your marriage. The best way to do this is by signing up for e-mail marriage services that are going to help you by ideas and tips.



By: Marriage Max

About the Author:

Intimacy is all about connection–the feeling that you and your partner are kindred spirits. The hallmark of a healthy marriage or relationship is feeling close and attuned to your partner, but maintaining this connection isn’t always easy. Therefore, finding ways to enhance intimacy is a priority for all couples.

Self-intimacy: A prerequisite to interpersonal intimacy

You are probably in many different relationships: with acquaintances, friends, family, coworkers, to name a few. When you think about the relationships in your life, does your relationship with yourself ever come to mind? Probably not, yet this relationship is central to all of your other relationships.

Self-intimacy is the experience of feeling connected to all of yourself–the parts of yourself you naturally embrace as well as the parts you wish didn’t exist. This connection allows you to feel grounded–giving you an emotional center that anchors your experiences. This anchor has an important place in your relationship.

To get a better understanding of your relationship with yourself, reflect on the following questions: “How do I feel about myself? What do I like about myself? Dislike? ****? Which parts of myself do I find easy to accept? Which parts make me feel uneasy or conflicted?” Your answers to these questions reflect the type of intimate relationship you have with yourself.

Self-Estrangement: A block to interpersonal intimacy

Unfortunately, you may not have access to important parts of yourself. Why? Because you can dislike a part (or parts) of yourself so intensely that you deny its existence. Your denial doesn’t mean, however, that these parts do not surface in your relationship–they usually seek expression. When you ignore parts of yourself, you’ve left the realm of self-intimacy (a connection to yourself) and have entered the world of self-estrangement (a disconnection from yourself).

At one time or another we’ve all denied certain truths about ourselves, maybe with little consequence–truths that would make us feel vulnerable or ashamed, desperate or inadequate. However, when you’re in a relationship, the consequences of self-estrangement are always significant. Why? Because you can never fully hide from your spouse or partner.

When self-intimacy is the norm, you’ll be fully present and emotionally available to your partner. When self-estrangement rules your inner world, you will remain disconnected from yourself and your partner. Your relationship is robbed of intimacy whenever you close off aspects of yourself to your partner.

Self-estrangement in action:

The husband who cannot be vulnerable with his wife is self-estranged–he denies his vulnerable self. A wife who minimizes her outbursts is self-estranged–she denies her anger. The girlfriend who ignores her jealousy is self-estranged–she denies her insecurities.

For the last ten years, Chris has worked almost nonstop to become a successful attorney. His driven nature has served him well professionally and he recently made partner at his New York City law firm. To his dismay, Chris’s work-related success has always eluded him in his personal relationships.

Chris complains that he often feels distant in his marriage, despite his wife Kendra’s encouragement to be more open and share his feelings. Chris is estranged from any emotions that make him feel “weak” or vulnerable. It’s his inability to connect with these parts of himself that continues to block intimacy in his marriage.

Chris’s first step in breaking out of this self-estrangement pattern is to honestly assess his relationship with himself–in particular, the parts of himself that he wished didn’t exist.

Are you ready to assess yourself?

Rate yourself and your relationship intimacy:

Using a scale from one (no intimacy) to ten (very satisfying levels of intimacy), rate the intimacy in your marriage or relationship.

If your rating is relatively high (8 or higher), than you probably don’t struggle with self-estrangement. If your rating is relatively low (4 or lower), self-estrangement may be standing in the way of a deeper connection with your partner.

To help determine the impact that your level of self-intimacy has on your marriage or relationship, now rate yourself on the self-intimacy/self-estrangement continuum below:

Self-Intimacy—————————————————–Self-Estrangement

Pick a spot on this continuum that reflects how connected (or disconnected) you feel to yourself. Try to think about how self-connected you feel in general, since this may shift for you, depending on circumstances. If the spot you choose is closer to the self-intimacy end of the continuum, this means you feel grounded and are able to share yourself fully with your partner; if your spot is closer to the self-estrangement end, you feel disconnected and are unable to share yourself fully with your partner.

Rating yourself can feel a little daunting, so give yourself enough time to adequately reflect on these issues. If it does feel like self-estrangement is holding you (and your relationship) back from achieving the intimacy you desire, speak with someone who can give you support around this issue (your partner, a trusted friend or family member, a counselor). You’ve already taken an important step by assessing your level of self-intimacy.

Are you ready to build a stronger, more intimate relationship?

To receive FREE monthly tips on how to build the relationship of your dreams, visit http://StrengthenYourRelationship.com/ and sign up for Dr. Nicastro’s Relationship Toolbox Newsletter.

As a bonus, you will receive the popular free reports: “The four mindsets that can topple your relationship” and “Relationship self-defense: Control the way you argue before your arguments control you.”



By: Richard Nicastro, Ph.D.

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