Everyone wants to have and build healthy relationships and believe it or not, it is up to you to decide if you are going to have a healthy relationship or not. Right from the onset of a relationship you should thrive for one thing. To have a healthy relationship with your mate. Here are a few tips you can use to build a healthy relationship with your partner. From the beginning of a relationship you should try as hard as you cannot to listen to what people have to say about your partner. This is because though there are people who want the best for you, there are others who would love to have nothing more than destroying your relationship. When you start listening to people the more fights you will have and that is not healthy.

Build healthy relationships by fighting in a fair way. When you have a fight, do not call your partner names. As much as you think words cannot hurt and that they are just words you are wrong. Some things you will say to your partner when you are having a fight are permanently destroying, you might never know this but you will definitely notice after the fight. You might never get to have the same kind of relationship after a fight because your partner might never trust you enough to know what you will do or say. When you loose trust in a relationship that is the begin of trouble and so it should be your job not to loose it and the best way not to loose it is to avoid fighting unfairly where by you call your partner names.

Build healthy relationships by being concerned. You should always show general concern for your mate. A healthy relationship is one that is built on general concern from both parties. The moment you stop showing interest in what ever your partner is doing the two of you are on your way to an unhealthy relationship. Always try t keep the communication line open between the two of you. This is because the more you communicate with your partner in making them know about your fears, your expectations, your failures and achievements the more you are on your way to a wonderful and fulfilling relationship. Couple who have closed communication lines are known to experience a lot of problems than those who are in open relationships. strive to be communicative with your partner right from the beginning and incase you loose the communication, try hard to get into again.

Forgiveness is also a key to build healthy relationships. When your partner does something wrong or hurtful you should forgive them. Holding a grudge will not help you much. It will only hurt your relationship even more. Do not keep a grudge for something your partner did months ago even if it is something as big as cheating. If you can not forgive him or her, you are better of leaving than staying with them because your relationship will be headed to a major heart ache.



By: Francis Githinji

About the Author:

Have you ever written a love letter lately for your ex love partner in your making up relationship?

 

 

 

 

Communication is a word we hear often when people talk about improving relationships. We receive voluminous communication from every corner of our lives and from a myriad of sources: e-mail, radio, postal mail, telephone, pagers, FAX, television, cell phones and more every year. A lot of people I speak with think they can’t escape contact with those around them. They feel that they do a pretty good job of interacting with others, especially when they have all the fancy, high-tech communication tools.

 

 

But in relationships it is the quality of the communication that makes the most difference, not necessarily the quantity or speed of delivery. If you say the same thing, in the same way, over and over every day, your loved ones can become inured to it.

 

 

This is especially true with the daily I Love You that is the staple of most loving, committed relationships. Just because you say it, does not mean that the message was received or perceived as sincere. Sincerity is always at risk with quick and easy forms of communication. It is easy to get into the habit of saying those three words with such ease that it is automatic.

 

 

One of the most powerful and sincerest forms of communication that we see very little of today is letter writing. I am not talking about e-mail or post-its. I mean a real letter that is written on real paper and dropped in the non-virtual mailbox down the street. Letters take time and thoughtfulness to create.

But what about the more efficient forms of communication in this technologically advanced age?

 

 

E-mail is easily written and often curt. Since e-mail is meant to allow quick and easy communication we often send messages without careful consideration. Furthermore, when e-mail is received the reader does not pause for a deep look because of the dozen other e-mails they received at the same time.

 

 

And forget those cutsie e-cards. They serve a purpose. They let someone know you are thinking about them and many times they may make them laugh (which is a good thing.) But in general, e-cards are not an effective delivery system for deep communication. As with paper greeting cards, the message in the e-card is filled out for you most of the time. And the phone? Why not that most ubiquitous of 21st century communication tools, the cell phone?

 

 

When you make a phone call you and the person you are talking to can both be doing a handful of other things at the same time, and as a result this form of verbal communication can be poorly thought out and impulsive. Ultimately the phone, especially the cell phone, is meant to be used as a device of convenience. And deep, intimate, carefully considered and sincere communication does not have convenience as the main objective. Greeting cards do not count (unless the sender has enclosed a substantial personal note which is rare). The greeting card industry has capitalized quite successfully on our inability to write from our own hearts, either due to lack of time or a perceived lack of creativity.

 

 

There are thousands of cards for every imaginable occasion with a heartfelt message already written out for us. All we have to do is sign our name (Even this is falling out of vogue in some circles - I have been given cards by people who do not sign their names so that the receiver can recycle the card and use it on someone else Yikes!!) Why is it that we need to buy our heartfelt sentiments in sterile, pre-packaged form? A letter, even a short one, can be symbolic of dedication. It shows commitment because it takes a little more time and care to organize ones thoughts and put them on paper. In addition, the written word is permanent and physical, two things that are a big part of committed relationships. It is a lot harder to deny what we have written than it is to deny what we’ve said.

 

 

For instance, if you say you are sorry to someone verbally you can equivocate and feel the person out so that you can alter your message depending on how you think things are going. Most people see through duplicity and equivocation in written form immediately. A letter forces you to state your feelings with permanence and, if you are practiced and take your time, clarity. When was the last time you received a letter that was either written or typed out by hand? I am willing to bet that this is an exceedingly uncommon occurrence for most of you.

The writing of a letter also provides the opportunity to surprise someone. Place it in a location where they will find it at an unusual moment. For example, as they are riding the train to work or about to eat their lunch. Any place where they will discover it and take pause is good.

 

 

This is also much more romantic than just handing someone note or sending them an e-mail. In fact, if you are in a long distance relationship and normally correspond by e-mail every day, it will be a big and welcome surprise for your partner to get some real mail. People often tell me that they do not feel they have any facility with writing and so cannot produce a letter, even a short one. A lot of people simply do not know what to say to their loved ones in a letter. If you think about it, you just have to say how you feel and what you are thinking. No one is completely devoid of feelings and no one has a blank mind (ever).

 

 

Sometimes people are overwhelmed with many feelings and thoughts. If you find that this is your situation, make a list of the top 3 feelings and thoughts that are swirling around in your head. Then pick one and address it. For instance, your top three thoughts or feelings related to your partner might be:

 

1. You forgot to kiss me goodbye this morning.

2. Do you really like that couch we ordered or are you just going along?

3. I really need some time alone with you . . . without the kids.

Even if you say what you feel in plain, simple, language (and this can be the best way most times) this is more than enough to make the point that you care. And the more you write the easier it will be and you will become more proficient at communicating your true feelings to others. There is one caveat. Do not use writing as a way of avoiding confrontation or inflicting pain. The “Dear John” letter is a prime example. Remember that just as the written word has the power to spread love, it can also do damage to a relationship.

 

 

Choose your words wisely and never send a letter written in anger or use the written word as an alternative for something that should clearly be done face-to-face. Many therapists and coaches see writing as a powerful form of therapy. Getting everything down on paper clears your head of tumultuous thoughts and emotion. It helps to calm most people.

 

 

There is even a sense of accomplishment when you have successfully described your feelings or concerns and can see them on paper. This is why journal writing is prescribed by so many therapists. You can even write letters to communicate deep feelings that you may not be able to speak of effectively in person at the appropriate time (either because you are unavailable or because you do not remember the exact feeling you had at the time.)

 

 

Here is a great idea that I got from a book by Mark and Dianne Button called, “The Letter Box: A Story of Enduring Love.” The authors suggest that you write letters to your loved ones at important times in their lives and keep the letters tucked away in a small box for your loved ones to open at a later date.

For instance, you can write a letter to your child on the day of his birth describing all the joy you are experiencing and what it is like to hold him for the first time. You give this to him when he is 30 years old or perhaps on the occasion of the birth or his first child. Now that’s something you can’t do with an e-mail!

Take the time to try this. Commit right now to write your partner or a loved one a personal note expressing your positive feelings toward them. Do it on paper. If a letter is too daunting, then write a couple sentences. If that is too scary, then try just a few words.

 

 

Just say what you feel, no matter how simple or silly (this is often best). Have faith that it will make their day. Put your letter to them where they will find it unexpectedly or mail it though the regular mail. I can guarantee that you will receive a positive response from them. And your letter can keep giving. Because, unlike words that are spoken (and then only a memory), a letter can be reread and experienced over and over. By taking the time to express your love in a permanent and clear form, you will are recommitting to your loved one and to the vitality of your relationship with them.

 

Indeed, life is short. Don’t let another day go by without taking a chance on happiness. You will never know until you try, so remember to make a move today. It can change or affect the rest of your life, therefore, at the very least, you can try to come out something for your ex love partner during your weekend plans. With a little practice, perseverance and patience, I believe that your relationship could be enhanced with the tips that I have shared earlier. If you have faced any problems with your loved ones, do not hesitate to visit this piece of article again.

 

 

I really have a strong belief that if you can understand what I have explained and applied what you have learnt from this piece of article, your problems can be eventually solved and your making up relationship can become more stable and stronger. I wish all the best for your making up relationship with your partner. Do always remember to spread word of mouth to your fellow friends for supporting the decision of having making up than breaking up.

 

 

 

 

 

 

How to win your ex girlfriend back easily?

 

Watch a video that shows you exactly what you must NEVER do, what you should do to get your ex back and why at Win Your Ex girlfriend Back Website.

 

You will also learn how to reverse the situation if you have already done those things that should NEVER be done.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



By: dhlim88

About the Author:

A healthy relationship between individuals helps bring the best out of both people. One can always work on improving relationships, as that is a normal way of improving life.

Getting Close to the other person in your life.

People are sometimes afraid of getting close with the other person and developing meaningful relationships. With a relationship comes the sharing of joys and sorrows, our positive points and the people’s shortcomings and our needs and our wants. There are many factors that play a role in preventing someone to get close to each other.

I will list several of the issues for you

1. How there is a fear of opening up. This to me is one of the greatest fears that plague almost all relationships. People don’t like to open up completely to the other person because they won’t know what the results are.

2. How there is a fear of losing one’s freedom. A relationship should be an equal thing that people should work on. Both of you should trust each other enough to know he/she will not want to take away things that you care about from you.

3. How there is a fear of disappointment. The fear of a relationship may end sometimes make many people scared in a long-term relationship. Most people would rather stay away from these relationships then having the risk of being disappointed.

4. How there is a fear of being judged. Being honest in a relationship means being judged for many people. In a relationship each person should accept that person the way they are with their good points and bad.

5. How there is a fear of being under an obligation. This can be difficult for some for whom this is the first time that they are having someone do something for them. They can be afraid because this place them at an obligation to the other person. They should understand that this gives and take is a part of any healthy relationship.

6. How there is a fear that it is not proper to express affection; many consider an open show of the relationship as improper. Many men believe that this is a sign of weakness. But at the same time this does show affection for your partner and that affection would mean a lot to the other person.

The one important fact that I have learned is to communicate your feeling with each other properly. You should be willing to open up with your most inner feeling that you have for that person, and that is what actually build the relationship and gets both people closer to each other. Being in a relationship means having the other person to support you and to comfort you in times of trouble and to share your good times with.





By: 104inc.com

About the Author:

Most relationships are very exciting in the beginning but if you have been in your current relationship for awhile already you may have noticed that the initial excitement you experienced is starting to waiver and you and your partner may be settling into a dull routine. As a relationship progresses one or both partners may be guilty of settling into complacency and may not strive to keep the element of excitement in their relationship. The following are a few tips for ensuring that your relationship stays as exciting as it was in the beginning.

Never underestimate the value of spontaneity in a relationship. Too often relationships lose their excitement because the mates fall into a routine that becomes boring as time goes by. Don’t be afraid to suggest new activities in your relationship or to try new things on a whim. Being spontaneous doesn’t have to involve big decisions it can be as simple as picking up something new at the grocery store and trying a new recipe for dinner. Whatever you do, just let your instincts take over for a minute instead of relying on rationality. Anything you do that is spontaneous may not work out as well as if you had planned out every last detail but just go with the flow and you’ll find your relationship taking a turn for the better.

Exploring a new location together is another way to bring the excitement back into your relationship. Whether you plan an elaborate trip to an exotic location or just take the bus to a nearby city that you have never visited your adventure together will help spice up your romance. Take your time exploring the new location and enjoy the foods and atmosphere that the new place has to offer. Exploring new cities can help bring the thrill back to your relationship.

Still another way to spice up a waning relationship is to sign up for an instructional class together such as a cooking, dancing or pottery class. Working together to learn a new skill will draw the two of you closer as you strive to accomplish a goal together. A class will enable you and your partner to interact in a new way. This new interaction will help to pull you out of a rut.

Spending a night at a hotel is another way to restore the excitement in your relationship. Intimacy is very important in a relationship and if you and your partner have found that this aspect of your relationship has lost it’s spice, it’s time to shake things up a bit. Choose a romantic hotel, preferably one with a cozy restaurant. Begin by having a wonderful candlelight dinner in the restaurant and then proceed to the room that you have reserved. Setting the mood with candles and dim lighting is also suggested. A night in a different location such as a romantic hotel will go a long way towards rekindling your intimate relationship.

Another way to bring the excitement back into your relationship is to set up a date night. While you may see each other daily and even go out to dinner every Friday night, setting up a date night outside of your usual schedule will enhance your relationship. Don’t just schedule a night to go out to dinner but treat each of these date nights as if they were first dates. Go all out getting yourself dressed up and take special care in your appearance. Prepare for your date night as if you were really trying to make a good first impression. Going out of your way to have at least one night of fun and romance a week will help add a little zing to your relationship.

Giving your mate gifts for no reason at all is another way to get your relationship back on track. You may have lavished gifts on your partner early in the relationship but as the relationship progressed you may not have done so as frequently. Small, meaningful gifts given just to make your partner happy will let them know that they are still always on your mind just as they were in the beginning of the relationship.

The simple act of holding hands can also add excitement back into a relationship. This intimate gesture conveys a sense of security but it also lets your partner know that you want to be close to them at all times. Many couples hold hands everywhere they go early in a relationship but don’t do so later on. Try grabbing your partners hand as you are out running errands together. They will be touched by the sentiment and will be happy to be sharing a sense of closeness with you again.

A kiss is still another way to bring the excitement back into your relationship. You may have gotten into the habit of giving your mate a kiss on the cheek or a quick peck on the lips when you see them after a long day of work. Trying kissing them with passion the next time you see them to catch them by surprise and really let you know not only how much you love them but how attractive you find them as well.

Having a common interest can also promote excitement in a relationship. If there is an activity that you both enjoy doing, make it something that the two of you do together often. For example if you both enjoy hiking make plans to go hiking every Saturday morning and each time you go out make it a little different by exploring a new location or setting new goals for yourselves. This will give the two of you a chance to reconnect while enjoying each other’s company. Having a ritualistic activity that you and your partner enjoy together creates closeness and intimacy that can help put the excitement back into your relationship.

Offering your partner a massage when they are worn out and tired can also bring the excitement back to your relationship. A massage can be a very sensual and intimate experience. Additionally offering a massage lets your partner know that you can see that they are stressed out and exhausted. They will appreciate your putting them first in the relationship and this will help bring back the excitement in your relationship.

Over time a relationship may lose some of the excitement that it had in the very beginning. While this may be troublesome it is also completely normal and also reversible. Noticing the lack of excitement in your relationship is the first step to restoring that excitement. It may take a little work but with a few simple actions you can be on your way to an exciting relationship.



By: Gerald Mcnicholl

About the Author:

The personals lava database contains more than 50,000 personal ads from men and women around the world. Personals lava comprises an internet community of singles seeking companionship and personal relationships. Personals lava members are scattered all over the world. Studies reveal that members use a seemingly limitless number on of parameters for narrowing their search results. Australians for example use terms like Aussie, and Englanders almost always use Uk. Canadians of course use Canada but quite often also include provinces such as Ontario. Of course in the United States we find everything from U.S. to NYC, Texas to Hawaii, and New York to Atlanta.

Personals lava stands is a lively community of thousands of active members. Most of the dating features at Lava life are free. Lava life’s unique advanced search features make it possible to browse profiles meeting your specific search criteria. Personals lava detail and instant messaging services make it possible to communicate quickly and easily with those persons of interest to you. Find your best matches, reply to them and receive messages from them from your profile listing. Personals lava life helps people to meet people.

Personals lava continues to be a global favorite in providing wholesome entertainment dating services for singles everywhere. Personals lava recognizes the many aspects of life that determines the type of person you would like to meet and the type of relationship you want to build. Personals lava helps fulfill your unique relationship goals and interests. You too can connect and interact with different people of your choice and have fun and sometimes wild communities. Personals lava is definitely a leading online dating destination for singles all over.



By: Agustin Patoval

About the Author:

So you’re in a long distance relationship, and naturally you’re looking for a long distance relationship guide. What sort of long distance relationship guide will serve you best? How about a ‘Sherpa’ - the people who lead adventurers up Mt. Everest - will they serve you well as your long distance relationship guide? Let’s be realistic, books can work well as a long distance relationship guide too.

A long distance relationship guide can be different things to different people. We’re all born with a burning need to have a relationship with someone we care for. But some of us choose the tougher road, the road less traveled, a long distance relationship. I recommend that anyone who traverses this road be well prepared before taking on such a journey. This type of relationship needs a long distance relationship guide for sure!

I’ve been in many relationships in my life, and a few of them - two to be exact, were long distance relationships. Did I have a long distance relationship guide when I started out? Oh no! I was young, naive and full of lust. I felt I could make it on my own while my loved one was living in another city. I soon found that I needed a long distance relationship guide to be my daily companion.

I’d like to share my experiences with long distance relationships and give you some insight into my long distance relationship guide.

Preparation for the Unknown

When I started out I didn’t have the slightest clue about my long distance relationship guide. I had lots of relationship experience to fall back on - I felt more than prepared for what lay ahead. I knew my partner was living in another city, we had telephones, cell phones, email, the Internet, web cams, text messaging - what more did I need. I soon found I needed my long distance relationship guide to smooth the road. No matter how much technology I had - I wasn’t prepared for the emotional onslaught that was about to happen.

I found myself longing for her voice after we hung up the phone. Why wasn’t this covered in my long distance relationship guide? How could I have been so absent-minded and not thought of the obvious. No matter how many way you have to communicate, you also need to be prepared for the emotions that come with a long distance relationship. My next points will help with this.

Setting and Managing Expectations

When you’re in a ‘normal’ relationship (same city) you just chat when we feel like it, send an email here or there. But when you enter a long distance relationship - communication becomes a staple in the relationship and it become quality instead of quantity. It’s important to have expectations on when you will communicate and for how long. There’s nothing written in your long distance relationship guide that prepares you for feeling snubbed, or forgotten when your loved one isn’t online, doesn’t return your call or email.

Setting these expectations in the beginning will save you a lot of mental anguish. Make sure you leave a page or two open in your long distance relationship guide to make mental notes. Not having expectations met can lead to troubling feelings about the long distance relationship and affect its survival.

Planning your Communication

As I’ve hinted previously, entering into a long distance relationship means you’ll need tools or services in order to communicate. I know it sounds obvious but you wouldn’t believe how silly I felt the first time was asked to have a voice conversation over MSN and I didn’t have a microphone. I felt lousy that I missed out on this opportunity to chat voice to voice. And with the Internet, this can be done for free (except the cost of a headset microphone).

So make sure your long distance relationship guide has an entry for your communication checklist. The more ways you have to communicate, the less apart you’ll feel. Nothing is better than getting a ‘(k)’ which means ‘kiss’ in text speak to me, or a dozen of them on your cell phone as a text message.

Conclusion

I hope you’ve learned about your own internal long distance relationship guide. It lives inside you and as silly as it sounds - it works. Make notes in it often. I sure did!



By: Rob Dunsmuir

About the Author: