Have you ever wondered just what makes another family member tick? They probably wonder just the same about you! With personality profiling you can discover how to improve any relationship. Before looking into the relevance of profiling in relationships, first a little background.

Introduction

People are different - but they are predictably different. A personality profile helps predict how someone will react in a given situation, helping you understand what motivates them - and what they’re trying to avoid. And they can understand you too. In his book “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People”, Dr Stephen Covey said: “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.”

In 1926 Dr William Marston, an expert in behavioural understanding and the inventor of the polygraph (lie-detector), devised a system to understand people’s personality styles. In his book “The Emotions of Normal People” he grouped people according to their active or passive tendencies, dependent upon their view of the environment. The main styles identified are:

D - Drive - “My Way” (3% of the population) I - Influence - “The Fun Way” (12% of the population) C - Compliance - “The Right Way” (16% of the population) S - Steadiness - “The Safe Way” (69% of the population)

Of course there aren’t just four styles, as everyone exhibits different levels of each of the four, resulting in an almost infinite number of combinations of the main styles. In fact a profile that showed someone as all one style would be extremely suspect. Your style, for instance, may be a combination of ‘High D’, ‘Medium I’, ‘Fairly C’ and ‘Low S’. No style is inherently ‘Good’ or ‘Bad’.

The aim of profiling is to identify and play to your strengths, while utilising the self-awareness of possible weaknesses. If you choose to share this knowledge with others, and they’re willing for you to study their profiles, relationships can be transformed.

Suddenly you may realise that what seemed to be an irritating trait in your partner has value you never appreciated before.

The personality profile derived from the combination of the different levels of each style gives an amazingly accurate profile of the subject in: How they think of themselves; How others see them; How they act under stress; Their communication preference; Greatest fears; Greatest motivators.

Knowing your own preferred style, and that of others, can go a long way towards creating an environment in which Dr Covey’s recommendation to “Think Win/Win” can flourish.

1. Responsibilities can be shared in a way that best utilises talents, instead of putting round pegs in square holes. For instance a High C hates conflict, so their High D partner would be better suited to complaining about poor service.

2. When you understand a partner’s greatest fears, this may explain many things that remain unsaid. In the example above, the High D who enjoys a full and frank exchange of views, may finally realise why a High C partner repeatedly puts off making that phone call of complaint.

3. You will understand how to motivate your partner, how they set goals for themselves and how best to support them. The High I ‘big picture’ goal-setter will often benefit from some detailed plans prepared by a High C family member.

4. You will learn possible growth areas - a High I may get a better response from others if they talk less and listen more. A High S can try to be more open to change. A high D and a high C may both come to appreciate the benefits of developing personal relationships, although these two will initially exhibit very different styles.

5. Graphs in the personality profile can identify normal individuals going through a tough time - for instance stress at work, or those too wary of making a move for fear of failure. They do not identify mental health problems.

6. Different styles communicate very differently. For example a high S working with a high D may withdraw in the face of the D’s direct style, thus slowing down results. When both are aware of their communication styles they can seek to modify their communication style and at least allow for the other’s point of view, even though they are unlikely adopt it themselves.

7. Personality profiling terminology provides a less-confrontational language for pointing out a partner’s unhelpful behaviour. For instance, “You need to up your C today” is likely to be better received than “Don’t you ever stop and think before you act?”

Obviously any of this knowledge could be used exploitatively, but that is counter-productive to building good relationships and has no place in the ethical use of personality profiling. If you fear that your partner might abuse the knowledge gained, it would be unwise to share it - relationship counselling would then be more appropriate.

Have you guessed what your style is? I guessed mine, before completing the questionnaire, and I was completely wrong. However, I have to confess that, as I read the report, I could see that I was deceiving myself, and in fact the analysis knew me better than I did. I wanted badly to be a High D - direct, dominant and demanding, instead I was a High C - compliant, contemplative and careful.

At first I was disappointed, but the point of personality profiling is to highlight strengths. Don’t be fooled into think that C and S styles are weak - they’re not. The more of the report I read, the more I realised that characteristics I was lukewarm about in myself are actually strengths I can use to move forward in a way that won’t make me feel threatened and I now know (and recognise from the past) the pitfalls I need to avoid.

What is your partner’s profile? Reading my own partner’s report, with his permission, gave me a new insight into some of his character traits. Knowing the motivation behind them helps me more deeply appreciate his talents and realise that we just have different ways of expressing ourselves.

How about your teenager son or daughter, now so difficult to understand? Think what it would be like to get into their heads and know what makes them tick. The possibilities are endless - for self-knowledge and for better inter-personal relationships at home and at work.

For a free eBook on other benefits and applications of personality profiling and to download a free sample report visit the website below.



By: anonymous

About the Author:

It has been said that this business decade is all about technology - but the next one will be all about relationships. This is how important building of relationships is considered to be.

As an employee, you can make your relationship and rapport building ability your best asset. It is going to be your best job skill and highly useful, no matter where you will be working. If you are going to change jobs several times during the span of your career, then building relationships is going to be the best thing that you learn how to do.

Every day you meet someone new and you connect with someone new. It is best to network with this person, as you do not know how that person can help you in your career. This is especially true at work; always build a good relationship and rapport with your colleagues, because you never know when you may need a professional favor from them.

The Bossy Way

Your growth at work could and most likely will depend on the way you behave with your boss. You have to remember that the reason your boss is your boss is because he is respected by top management. You will do really well for yourself if you build a good working relationship with your boss. They are the one who will let you handle major clientele or accounts, and who is also responsible for your appraisals and performance reviews.

Your boss can be your best mentor. Your boss is the best person to give guidance and direction about your job. You not only have to build a professional relationship with your boss, but it would also benefit you to build a personal relationship with them. This doesn’t mean you are sucking up to them, it just means that you respect them as a person. So get to know him on a more personal level. You could call their family for lunch or dinner or you could go golfing with them; do whatever it takes to get to know them better.

Cooperating with Coworkers

Your coworkers and colleagues are important to your career. The way you work and deal with them reflects on your people skills. The relationships that you build with them can be very valuable. Do whatever it takes to build a bond with them. Help a colleague who is lagging in his work. Compliment them on an accomplishment or job well done. Go to the bar around the corner and socialize with them after work. Have a drink or two together. Get to know your co-workers on a more personal level. It will help you to build your network.

The Client, The King

Your client is the king. Today when the market is so competitive and so similar, where every product is the same, where is the edge? The edge lies in customer service. Customers are likely to be drawn to a company that is better at customer service than its competitors. You as an employee have to build that relationship with your customer to ensure that your customer comes back to you and appreciates your work well enough to put in a good word to your boss.

In an increasingly competitive business world, building relationships can make or break your career - so don’t underestimate the importance of it.



By: Tony Jacowski

About the Author:

Seven ways you can boost sales and thrive in the new economy

#1: Focus on existing relationships

It’s a different market out there today from the one that many of us have known for the last several years. There’s no disputing that this new economy presents plenty of challenges, and yet by adopting the right approach, it’s also an opportunity for sales professionals to actually thrive…even in a tough market. The secret to success in sales today isn’t found by adopting untested techniques, many of which are packaged with fancy sounding names that sizzle with promises, but fall short on delivering results.

As a sales professional and as a business owner, I’ve weathered all kinds of markets, and I’ve had the great fortune to learn from others who have also managed to stay at the top of their game. What I have learned is that success in any market (and in any profession…not just sales) is owed in large part to emulating time-honored, field tested business habits and repeating those often enough and consistently enough that they become second-nature to you.

In this first of a series of seven articles examining what you can do to boost your sales and thrive in this new economy that is taking shape around us today, we’re going to look at the importance of existing relationships—why they matter and how you can go about leveraging who you know.

Being successful is about more than applying what you know

Your knowledge and the raw skills you offer matter a lot in your work, but it is a mistake to underestimate the importance of who you know and of how hard you work to cultivate that network. This is true of sales as it is of other professions. Consider the lessons learned in a landmark study conducted in the 1990s, in which researchers studied the habits of star performers among engineers at Bell Laboratories.They found that most engineers in that organization had similar academic credentials and shared an aptitude for problem-solving. However, the top performers were the ones who invested time and effort in building and maintaining relationships that they could rely on when needed in their work.

The lesson here is a universal one: you can differentiate yourself—even when you’re matched by others in terms of skills or resources—simply by focusing on your personal relationships and networks. But the lessons don’t stop there. It’s also important to recognize that when it comes to networking and relationship-building, the ones you have already established are the ones that are the easiest to maintain.

Don’t overlook your existing customer base

Start by looking at your current customer sales database. You might be surprised by who you know! All too often, this step is skipped by companies who are hungry for new business. Many will spend a considerable amount of time and money to find new customers, and do so at the expense of the customers with whom they are currently doing business.

Even worse, some try to rationalize this behavior by saying: “well, we lose a good percentage of customers every year anyway.” Never accept that kind of reasoning! Customer losses are, in fact, fully preventable. It costs a business far less to retain an existing customer than it does to find new ones. This is particularly important in today’s marketplace, because as I pointed out in an earlier article, companies today are entrenching their existing business relationships, sticking with vendors they trust.

From your customer database, compile a list of who has actively bought from you in the past. If you notice that there is one customer in that list that you haven’t heard from in a while, call them and find out why.

Be sure to call your regular customers, too. Even if the purpose of your call is to simply thank them for their business, gestures of appreciation are always noticed. If your client is allowed to accept gifts, consider sending them a gift basket of goodies, or even gift cards from their favorite retailer. Not only does this help to solidify your existing relationships, it send an important message: “you matter to me.”

Listen carefully to identify new needs and be a resource

Do your clients have new needs or new requirements? In tough economic times when many organizations are seeing their budgets and staff shrinking, you need to find out what’s going on in their world…right now.

Whether you’re meeting a customer face-to-face or talking on the phone, be sure to ask leading questions to find out if they’re going to need additional things from you. Ask them completely open-ended questions to find out if they’re looking at new services, products, solutions, even those that might be outside your scope of work. You can be a valuable resource simply by recommending the work of someone in an affiliated field, or by partnering with that person to offer your customer an all-in-one solution.

The message you are sending is an important one: I’m more than a vendor or a service provider…I’m a resource you can count on. Again, it’s all about differentiating yourself from the rest of the market. Being thoughtful and showing empathy for people you do business with doesn’t have to cost you a dime and yet it leaves a lasting impression on people because it demonstrates that you’re focused on something more than just making your commission.

This takes me to my last point: there is a real danger right now—especially those who are feeling fearful because they’ve never sold through a downturn before. Never put your needs of earning a commission ahead of your customer’s need to solve a problem. When you’re in front of a customer and all you’re thinking about is “how the heck am I going to get my commission out of this guy,” they can smell it just like a Conrad (my pup) smells fear.

Take the initiative and look at your existing relationships. Be persistent. Be a resource. It’s hard work, but the effort pays off—not only in terms of commissions, but also in terms of having customers who really enjoy doing business with you. As our good friend Zig Ziglar reminds us all, success come from hard work much like water comes from priming an old-fashioned water pump: “if you will pump long enough, hard enough, and enthusiastically enough, sooner or later the effort will bring forth the reward.”



By: Colleen Francis

About the Author:

Meeting with any kind of accident can make anyone feel helpless, not knowing how to deal with the situation. If the accident resulted due to someone else’s fault, you can surely seek claim for it. A personal injury claim is a situation where an injured party seeks compensation from the person who has caused the injury. It may include a negotiation with the latter’s insurance company. So, you should be extremely careful in choosing the right personal injury lawyer who can offer you assured success.

Types of personal injuries on which you can claim

The extent of your claim depends on the seriousness of your injury. Claim is made for loss of earnings as well as compensation for bodily injuries and emotional distress. You can claim in the following cases:

Loss of income due to personal injuries. Medical expenses for injuries related to accident. Emotional losses, for example: anxiety and depression on account of worries, impact on personal relationships. Permanent physical disability or disfigurement. Loss of social, educational and family experience, for example: missed family events, school or training. Property damages.

  

Immediate steps to be followed after an injury

Personal injury compensation is the reward received by accident victims to make up for the physical and monetary loss they suffered. If you suffered a car accident for instance, in order to achieve compensation, you should keep the following things in mind:

1. Take notes about the accident and your injuries - This will help your lawyer to claim and turn the case in your favour. 2. Your claim should be valid - The injury, against which you are claiming, should be reasonable. You cannot claim for a superficial injury, such as a slight scratch. 3. Your opponent should have been at fault - A road traffic claim is against the person whose mistake caused the accident. You cannot win any compensation unless you prove that your opponent was at fault. 4. Your claim should be backed by evidence - If you produce relevant evidence in the form of doctor’s certificates, medical reports, photos of injury and police documents, it will help you win the claim very easily. 5. Your claim should be reasonable - You should be extremely careful in presenting a reasonable claim. If you produce an unreasonably high amount for claim, you might end up losing the claim. 6. Your claim should be timely - The law lays down a specific time limit, following an accident, during which you should file the road traffic claim. A claim made after this period are rejected.

So, if you have faced any kind of accident, don’t forget to meet a personal injury lawyer at the first place. An experienced personal injury lawyer can guide you perfectly to secure maximum compensation for all the physical, emotional and financial losses suffered by you due to the injury.

To know more about personal injury lawyers, www.thelawportal.co.uk. 



By: Richard Hughe

About the Author:

nality Disorders

 Definition:

Clinically significant deviation of normal personality development.  Personality disorders must have the following features:

Marked deviations in behavior and attitudes from the expected cultural norm The abnormal behavior and attitude are enduring and consistent across a range of experiences The abnormal behavior and attitudes have their origin in childhood and adolescence The disorder causes distress to the subject or to others, and creates problems in areas of personal and social functioning.

Personality does not change except:

Organic personality disorder: secondary to a general medical cause such as encephalitis Enduring personality change: occurs following either a prolonged experience where life at risk (PTSD due to torture, natural disaster) or recovery from a severe mental illness.

Epidemiology:

Range from 6 to 10% (very common). Population with PD have a higher rate of mental illness, depending on the type.

Aetiology:

Genetic Predisposition (30%-60%) Attachment Experience Traumatic events (causing connection ‘failure’) Family constellation and dysfunction Socio cultural and political factors.

All the above function in a complex fashion

v Cluster A (The Eccentric) or The Weird:

1. Schizoid Personality Disorder:

Emotional coldness and lack of warmth displayed towards others, few activities provide pleasure. Prefers to be alone, little interest in social relationships or sexual experience. Indifferent to social conventions, personal criticism. Excessively introspective preferring solitary activities.

2. Paranoid Personality Disorder:

Distrust and suspiciousness of others, extreme sensitivity to criticism plus a tendency to misconstrue the remarks or actions of others Incapacity to forgive others and tendency to bear grudges Excessive sense of self-importance and personal rights

3. Schizotypal Personality Disorder:

Similar to the above but with more prominent eccentric behavior, overvalued ideas, and non-hallucinatory perceptual abnormality (related to schizophrenia genetically). v Cluster B (The Dramatic) or The Wild:

4. Dissocial (Antisocial) Personality Disorder:

Low tolerance to frustration with tendency to react aggressively Excessive irresponsibility and rejection of social norms; tendency for impulsive, short-term gains without fear of potential consequences Others are blamed for their behavior Inability to experience guilt or remorse Inability to form long term relationship

5. Borderline Personality Disorder:

Emotionally unstable with excessive mood fluctuation usually lasting a few hours but occasionally several days. Containing feelings of anger and are particularly difficult Recurrent suicidal threat or attempts, such as overdosing or self-mutilation Other impulsive behavior such as substance misuse or promiscuity which could be dangerous for the individual Tendency to form intense and volatile relationships Disturbance of self image with characteristic feelings of emptiness, boredom and fear of being abandoned by others.

 6. Histrionic Personality Disorders:

Prone to self-dramatization particularly through activities where they are centre of attention Emotionally shallow, suggestible, exaggerated expression, and over concern with their appearance. Self-indulgence and manipulation of others for their needs. v Cluster A (The Fearful) or The Worried:

7. Dependent Personality Disorder:

Excessive submissiveness and subordination to others with reduced capacity to take responsibility for their own actions and make decisions Excessive fears of being abandoned by those they are dependent on, going to great length to engender support and reassurance from others Preoccupation with feelings of incompetence and inability to care for themselves.

8. Anxious (Avoidant) Personality Disorder:

Preoccupation with feelings of inadequacy and inferiority Feeling of tension and apprehension Avoidance of personal relationships and social situations for fear of rejections or negative criticism Reluctance to take risk or take part in new activitie

9. Anankastic (Obsessive-Compulsive) Personality Disorder:

Preoccupation with details and rules Excessive perfectionism, single- mindedness and inflexibility in behavior and attitudes to the extent that task completion and decision-making are impaired Excessive doubt, caution, and self-criticism Insistence that others conform to their own standards Although intrusive thoughts or impulses may occur, the disorder is distinct from obsessive-compulsive disorder in that obsession and compulsions do not occur and is ego-syntonic

Prognosis and treatment:

Integrative (i.e. medication and psychotherapy). Stronger evidence for psychotherapy. Cluster A most resistant to treatment, reward dependence à Noradrenalin Cluster B most amenable to treatment, Novelty seeking àDopamine Cluster C intermediate, Harm avoidanceàSerotonin

Previously PD was assumed to reduce with age, however recent evidence suggests that this view is unrealistic and the traits may be more rigid and transform.

References:

1. Stevens L, Rodin I. Psychiatry: An illustrated colour text, Churchill Livingstone 2001 2. Steple D. Oxford Handbook of Psychiatry, Oxford University Press, 2006 3. Guthrie E & Creed F. Seminars in Liaison Psychiatry. Royal college of Psychiatrist 2007 4. World Health Organization (WHO). ICD-10 Classification of mental and behavioural disorders. Churchill Livingstone 5. American Psychiatric Association (APA). DSM-IV-TR. Fourth Edition Text Revision. APA Publication 6. King D. Seminars in clinical psychopharmacology. Second Edition 2004. Royal College of Psychiatrists

 

 

 

 

 

 



By: Prof. Saoud Al Mualla

About the Author:

Character is the set of qualities that make somebody distinctive. It is the outward manifestation of what you believe inside your mind and spirit. It is your nature, personality and moral fiber. Your character is the attitude and mindset which indicates to others who you are and what you stand for. Character, values and standards are not inborn or inherited, they must be learned, accepted and believed by the person.

Belief System Reflects Actions

if your parents called you lazy, you can either incorporate that label as a part of your character and indeed become lazy. Or you can choose to believe that even though you did not pick up your jacket as a child or occasionally forgot to take out the trash, overall, you are not lazy but actually ambitious and are committed to being a team player.

You know that you can be counted on. That you are honest and hard working as a general rule, even if now and then you do something that appears lazy to others. You work on reinforcing those positive beliefs rather than wallowing in negative labels given you by others.

List of Positive Character Traits

As you read through this small list of admirable character traits, check the ones that you believe are a part of your inner guidance system. Do your children know that you feel strongly about these attributes and? Perhaps you should share with them the qualities that make you the person you are today.



Appreciative

Courageous

Committed

Compassionate

Confident

Dependable

Fair

Faithfull

Flexible

Friendly

Generous

Gentle

Grateful

Honest

Humble

Integrity

Kind

Loving

Loyal

Optimistic

Patient

Persistent

Resourceful

Respectful of all

Responsible for choices

Self-control

Sincere

Tolerant

Trustworthy

Truthful

Warm and welcoming



This is a partial list of character traits and values that could change our society and the world if they were incorporated into the lives of each person.

As teachers, parents, coaches and adults who work with youth on a daily basis, we have an opportunity to mentor the next generation.

The best teacher is a role model.

Children, neighbors and coworkers are watching what we do, much more than what we say. If we feel that character is important, do we show that belief in action? Do we follow our own spiritual compass? Do we want them to do as we do or just as we say?

Praise Character Strengths and Choices of the Heart

In order to encourage those in our circle of influence and our own belief system, we need to recognize and acknowledge the correct choices made daily. Rather than say “Good Job” when your son carries in the neighbor’s groceries, look for the basic character trait he exhibited. How about saying “wow, you are really a thoughtful person. You saw that she needed help and you offered. You have a kind heart.”

Character strengths and choices of the heart can be transferred to many situations and used to reinforce positive action. By complimenting and reinforcing the value system, we encourage self esteem and confidence.

Good luck in your endeavors to find the golden nuggets of character, values and standards in your heart and the hearts of others in your circle. When we look for and encourage strong and noble characters, we will have a better family, neighborhood, community, nation and world. And isn’t that what we are all about?



By: Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship coach

About the Author: