Finding a person online that intrigues you enough to pursue an online relationship is difficult. Once you have found that person you need to revisit the age old issues of developing that relationship. In many respects, some may say that online relationships are easier then in person relationships. But, in reality it is pretty much the same, just a little bit more removed. Dating tips are essentially the same, but they are a little more subtle then if you are face-to-face.

Safety

Even if the person sounds fantastic online you must be aware that there are some people out there that are being all you want them to be, but with ulterior motives. The very first piece of online dating advise is to not to give the person on the other end any numbers like telephone or PIN numbers regardless of how good they sound.

Be honest with yourself

Relationship advice is always a bit suspect because we are all a bit different. Dating advice from one person to another only reflects that one person giving the dating advice and not necessarily how it applies to you. Always take advice on dating and apply it, with modification, to who you are. Don’t fudge about who you truly are, it will only come back to haunt you later on.

Slow and steady

One dating tip for a quality online relationship is to take it slow. Some might more aptly call this dating tip the restriction of to-much-information (TMI.) You do not need to have an online relationship develop 100 percent in one or two weeks. Let the personal information out slowly. A little mystery will go a long way to building the relationship.

Inflection

This particular piece of online dating advice is one item that requires a bit of work. Voice inflection when online is lost. Inflection is one of those things that we really take for granted. Quite a bit of meaning is lost without it. If you are sarcastic (like me) you can quickly lose somebody on the other end if they don’t know how the words are intended. This is one of the reasons that the LOL and smile face type notations have come about. The problem is, many people find these notations a bit “cutesy.” The online dating advice here is to use words to explain your inflection rather then symbols. So, if sarcastic, simply insert (sarcasm) into the text or use uppercase (OH BOY!!!) for very happy or (OH BOY) for can you believe what he did.

Conversation

Most people say that the art of conversation is dead. In a certain sense this also applies to online dating. Using text abbreviations and assumptions make online relationship building even more impersonal then it already is. This particular piece of online dating advice could be applied to regular relationship building as well. Use simple but descriptive whole worlds to describe what you are discussing. The right word will say quite a bit about who you are. For example: I like kayaking because of the way the paddle slips into the calm water works better then paddling is relaxing. You will come off as a bit more refined rather then just another person online.

Don’t impose

This is perhaps the hardest piece of advice for dating online to get used to. It is so easy to use a word that imposes a thought, belief or need onto another person without even knowing that you are doing it. If there is one thing that will stop an online relationship dead in its tracks it is imposing yourself on another. Once your online relationship progresses a bit you may loosen up a bit with this piece of relationship advice but until then always defer to the other person in the way you phrase a sentence. Make sure you make it known how you feel, but be sure that the wording reflects the other person’s ability to disagree or agree.

Be positive

Nobody likes a “gloomy Gus” when they get online. They really don’t want to be in an ongoing relationship with such a person, unless they happen to be a gloomy Gus. Stay up beat when you are writing with your online friend. Sure, everybody has their down days, and that is fine to share. It shows that you are becoming comfortable with that person. If there starts to be a pattern, however, you may want to assess what is going on with yourself personally or with a friend but there is really no need to share it online. If your assessment leads to a life change for the better…well, that is a great thing to share. Relationship advice or not, good news is a turn on for most.

Be open ended

Just about everybody has heard the phrase “leave them wanting more.” This holds true for online dating. You might think about your daily online conversations or your longer term relationships as a multi-course dinner. Always leave the person salivating for the next course. One of the better ways to do this is ask a question or two that requires a little thought or research. This will let them have something to bring to the table for your next conversation. This would also apply to you. Indicate that you will look into something and let them know what you find the next time you write.

Meeting for the first time

The big piece of online dating advice here is to meet in a busy place. All the online chat in the world won’t substitute for the first meeting and a true assessment. Try to stay relaxed. Listen, but be able to carry the conversation. Stick to areas where you can find help quickly. Call me a bit of a cynic but safety first.

Most importantly be yourself

How many times have you heard that one? Fortunately or not, the statement does ring particularly true for online relationships. A certain amount of “you” will seep into the online relationship whether you like it or not but try for being true to yourself all the time. Faking who you are will doom the relationship, unless you really didn’t want an online relationship in the first place. If you swear quite a bit in life, go for it (just use symbols so as to not offend to much.), if you happen to be one of those folks that dots their “I’s” with a heart go for that as well. Be who you are and the need for online relationship advice will go away fairly fast.



By: Robert

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Life is not a bed of roses and the same can be said about relationships. It would be unwise to expect the emotions between various individuals to remain at the same, steady level at all points of time and disagreements are bound to arise. In addition, when anger or jealousy raises its ugly head, then all love seems to fly out of the window. At times like this, we need a balancing effect to smooth out the ruffled feathers of the quarrelling couple. The ancient Chinese practice of Feng Shui can help in creating perfect harmony in every personal relationship, besides other aspects of life like health, wealth and career. Feng Shui love tips if properly implemented can help to balance the yang (male) and yin (female) energies and bring the elements in perfect harmony with each other.

Feng shui love principles can be applied for any situation, whether you are a single person waiting for love to enter your life, or even if you are already in a relationship with a partner and are looking for ways and means to enhance the bond. The south west area of our living space defines the personal relationship area and Feng shui love tips work towards enhancing that aspect of our lives. Colors like passionate red and pink in our bedroom or the southern area of the house help to bring the loved ones closer to each other. It is also advisable to keep a pair of mandarin ducks in the bedroom where the couple sleeps. It helps to bring about greater love and understanding among the partners.

If you want to attract love into your life you could try having peonies in your house. If the real flowers are not available, a photograph of the same will do equally well. However, peonies can cause infidelity in the case of married couple, so it is best avoided in that case. Hanging clear crystals in the south corner of the living room can also bring about harmony among the various members of the family. Certain precious and semi precious stones like pink quartz also have relationship enhancing qualities and they also look appealing when worn on the wrist as a charm. It can also be the ideal gift for your girlfriend when you want her to be in your life forever.

Simple things like the décor and furnishings of the house can also make a deep impression on your mindset and the related behaviour. In order to promote harmony among family members, it is important that the furnishings in the living room and bedroom have round and soft edges rather than hard and pointed ones. Choose soft colors like soothing pink for your bedroom and light scented candles and incense sticks in the house to ensure the flow of chi (energy) smoothly among the many rooms. An important point to be considered while implementing any Feng Shui tip is that it should be done only under the guidance of an experienced professional. Keeping this in mind you can safely implement Feng Shui love tips to build harmonious and loving relationships in your life.



By: Amit Bhalla

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In the Bhagavad-gita Krishna states that He comes to this world whenever there is a rise in religion and a decline in religion. He comes to re-establish religious principles, annihilate the miscreants, and protect the devotees.By the phrase “rise in irreligion,” Krishna indicates that irreligious activities such as meat eating, illicit sex, intoxication, gambling, and Godlessness in general are widespread. In the modern age, we not only find the majority of the populace performing these irreligious acts, but the government and leaders in general are encouraging irreligion.

One who performs irreligious acts is breaking the laws of God, which are immutable. Modern theologians very enthusiastically declare that religious principles must be changed or adapted to meet the changing conditions in this world. But God does not see things this way. He holds one responsible for breaking His laws regardless of what excuse one may offer, or what theologian one may quote.

In this age of Kali (quarrel) Krishna appears as His Holy Names: Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare’ Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare. Simply by worshiping Him by chanting these names, one can attain all spiritual perfection and be freed from the influence of this dark age.

1. Bhagavad-gita 4.7

2. Bhagavad-gita 4.8

In the Bhagavad-gita Krishna explains the four types of persons who reject Him, as well as the four types of persons who approach Him.

The types that reject Him are: 1. The man who works like an *** and tries to enjoy like one, forgetting God completely, 2. Someone who is not even civilized enough to think of God, 3. Someone who is caught up in the pursuit of mundane knowledge, and 4. The out and out atheist who is determined never to worship God and attempts to convert others to his view point.

God is approached by those: 1. Desiring relief from distress, 2. Desiring knowledge, 3. Desiring wealth or other material benefits, and 4. Who are inquisitive or curious. Of course these are mixed.motives, but ultimately one will be purified of these if one sticks to the spiritual path.

“Pure love of God” means that one simply wants to please God, and one is ready to sacrifice his own happiness to accomplish this end. When one feels this way, he experiences the greatest happiness. Pure love of God is the greatest gift that God can give.

1. Bhagavad-gita 7.16, 7.19

Many transcendentalists attempt to escape the miserable conditions of this world by approaching God. Unfortunately, many of them think that the highest realization of God is His energy. Thus, they realize the eternal aspect of the Lord, but never get to enjoy the knowledge and bliss that accompany personal realization.

Impersonalists often speak of God as “The Light” or “The Force”, but these (the light and the force) are His energies. God is a person, the controller and proprietor of these energies, and when the impersonalists seek to merge with His energies, they miss the joy of a personal relationship with Him. The impersonalist thinks that by losing his personality in “oneness” with God he will find relief from suffering; but the devotee knows that the soul’s individual identity is never lost. By having a spiritual relationship with the Lord, the individual soul will discover, and be able to express his real personality, experience complete satisfaction, and be free from all suffering.

The soul is by nature active and pleasure seeking; therefore, in the unnatural situation of impersonal realization, the soul is dissatisfied, and again falls down to this world, attempting to enjoy the material variety, being unaware of the spiritual variety that a devotee enjoys in the association of the Personality of Godhead, Krishna.

The sun is the energetic source of the sunshine ,(the energy). The energetic is comparatively more important than its energy. In the same way the devotees recognize Krishna as the energetic source of all energies. The devotees worship the energetic (Krishna) rather than His energy, and reject the idea of merging into His energy.



By: Victor Epand

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Often men and women are at opposite ends of the spectrum when the issue of relationships is taken into account. Their behaviors and differences are most noticeable when taking into consideration how they behave during emotion charged conflicts. This provides a clear insight into realizing how they process their differences.

According to surveys written by relationship counselors, limited communication is credited for more than half of the failed relationships that are observed and documented. This is not a surprise to anyone who has lived inside a relationship that has lasted more than a couple of weeks.

One very interesting factor is the number of reasons that lead to the failure of relationships. Stories of the behavioral misdeeds and misunderstandings that trigger relationship disasters reveal an intricate series of obvious manipulations.

Differences in how individuals in a relationship were raised and the reasons couples came together in the first place can differ so much that their motives often contribute to tears in the fabric of the relationship.

One example is the emotional baggage one or both partners may carry from from having survived terrible childhood experiences. What is learned from each perspective that is observed provides examples that counselors apply from their session successes and small failures.

This equips them to help couples from a diverse range of points of view. The knowledge and experience of long sessions with couples focused coaching provides relationship coaches a rich storehouse of tools for helping partners in a relationship.

The old expression, “Knowledge is power,” sounds true once it is pointed toward a relationship’s survival. When couples take even a few minutes to focus on their relationship strengths, they can learn to make the relationship stronger. By stronger I mean, the strength that many relationships experience is founded on old mental junk being experienced over and over by the partners.

In nearly every situation couples keep their baggage a secret from their partner. Most of the time partners wait until it’s too late to share their baggage with their partner. The primary issue that hurts the relationship is often not the emotional baggage or the related issues that contribute to the break up of the relationship.

What tends to accelerate the failure of the relationship is the silent misery and suffering compounded with a quietly held feeling that the other partner should actually know everything about this baggage, even though neither of them has ever risked talking directly about the issue that causes them to suffer.

Working to make your relationship work may seem like a big task but often adding more humor can have an amazing impact. There are many ways to put your relationship on a different track, but it may take lots of out of the box thinking to get the ball rolling. John Maxwell, the extremely talented author of “Relationships 101,” says, “People don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care.” In many relationships couples ignore this most valuable part of any relationship’s potential for improvement.

Thinking more about looking at ways of growing your relationship outside he physical level of living together, means each partner must be profoundly dedicated to the other partner. Once both partners center on their loyalty to each other change can begin.

This step includes undertaking the risk of assuming each of the partners is keeping a secret about the baggage they bought into the relationship. This is not a suggestion that partners pry or aggressively intrude into the other partner’s privacy, because privacy is always vital in a relationship.

The message here is that while privacy must forever be honored, partners must share the secrets that could hurt the relationship if they are not disclosed. Communicating is not requiring your partner to divulge every detail of their day. True communication travels to physical and emotional locations untouched by words alone.

What helps to translate the balance that is required starts with looking into the heart of the matter and searching for a means of locating a handle on one’s own baggage. Many times partners are attracted to each other because of their differences.

It is well known that children who experience an abusive environment will mostly find themselves in an abusive relationship as an adult. Acknowledging the reality of the presence of this baggage in one’s self forms the basis of the subconscious desire for the other partner’s understanding in the form of silent knowing.

Additionally, it is also true that this baggage, once revealed, helps the partner gain an enhanced understanding of the behaviors and barriers that have been part of the relationship. The healing and preventative process should start out with a message and an understanding that all old baggage, both known and unknown, lives|in the relationship.

Both partners must also acknowledge that open and honest communication is the primary component for the success of the relationship, while limited communication can be the main cause for any potential for the failure of the relationship. Relationships where limited communication is the norm won’t survive.

Relationships survive when open and sensitive communication is active and practiced regularly. Once open communication is ends, so does the relationship.



By: Daniel Millions

About the Author:

Regardless of your personality type, values and behaviors, the journey to achieving a balanced, happy life will be much easier, and much more successful and harmonious if you learn to understand and communicate effectively with the people you meet on your journey. We’re talking about finding common ground among the four major personality types: Supportive, Direct, I (ego centered) and Controlling, focusing this time on the Supportive, or S, personality type.

How Supportive People See Themselves: S personalities are the caregivers of the world, the nurturers and peacemakers. Just as men make up a preponderance of the D (Direct) personalities, the great majority of S personalities are women. Their world begins and ends with people and relationships.

How Others See Supportive People: D personalities are the opposite of S personalities and do not understand the S’s focus on people and relationships. D’s do not grasp that the S personality focuses on people and relationships while the D’s place emphasis on things and ideas. S’s are the ultimate team players, while D’s see a team as another organization for them to lead.

I (ego centered) personalities have a lot in common with the S’s because they are the two personality types that are supportive. However, the I’s are preoccupied with themselves, their needs, wants and desires while S’s are concerned with the needs, wants and desires of others. There is often a symbiotic relationship between the I’s and the S’s.

The C (Controlling) personality loves the thoughtful, careful, quiet nature of the S’s, presence. After all, they are the two personality types on the same side of the indirect line. The tension between these two groups comes from the fact that the C’s are solitary as people and controlling in their behaviors. The C’s are very slow and careful in forming relationships, while S’s, who are always ready to form a relationship at a moment’s notice, are too emotional and not analytical enough for the C’s.

Career options for Supportive Personalities

The S’s are the teachers of the world, particularly of young children. Nursing is another profession dominated by S personalities. The entire healthcare industry is, in fact, dominated by S personalities. Staff who work in medical fields that involve close doctor-patient relationships, such as ob-gyn, family practice and childcare, tend to be filled with S types. The social workers of the world are almost always S personalities as are people who enjoy working with animals. They often choose careers based on causes; save the earth, the environment, the children, the planet, the redwood trees. People who are very passionate about causes are usually S personalities.

Speech of Supportive Personalities

S personalities speak slowly and softly. Their words are kind and thoughtful. They ask permission to ask direct questions, but they really prefer indirect questions. They will often stop and ask if what they are saying is “alright or okay with you.” They are never confrontational. They make requests rather than give orders, even when the situation might call for a direct order. They are profoundly concerned that their words and tone should never be interpreted as harsh or offensive. Their language is supportive and nonjudgmental.

Clothes, Cars and Houses

S personalities are careful and thoughtful and conservative dressers. The statement their clothes make is that the wearer is a warm, comfortable person, one who can be trusted and someone who is supportive. Male S personalities dress like Mr. Rodgers of TV fame and women dress like your second grade teacher: “cuddly” and comfortable.

S’s drive family cars because they are family-focused. They drive minivans, and while their children are young they drive multi-passenger vehicles for car pooling, loading up for church picnics and collecting food for the homeless shelter. They are unlikely to choose an SUV because it is not environmentally friendly. Their vehicles are conservative in style and color and they never drive over the speed limit.

S personalities do not have houses; they have homes! Houses are full of things but homes provide the foundation for relationships. Walk into the home of an S person and the walls will be covered with family photos, and pictures of weddings, anniversaries, and the kids growing up. S’s live in friendly neighborhoods and are active in their local communities.

Values: Family, Money, Relationships

Absolutely nothing is more important to an S personality than family and other close personal relationships. This is the very definition of the supportive personality. They exist to make the world a better place by getting and keeping people together. Money is not important to S’s. If they win the lottery, after making sure their family is secure, they will give the rest away.

Time

Ss are very considerate about time because it is a way of honoring others. They like to be on time, but often will have trouble breaking away from one group of people to be on time with another. They never want to appear rude or uninterested in the first group by leaving, even to meet someone else. Given a conflict between time with people and time on a chore or idea, people will always get the attention and commitment of the S personality.



By: Art Kleimer

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